When we catch children in a lie, we naturally feel betrayed, hurt, angry and frustrated. We may feel scared about what this means for our child’s future. Sometimes we may feel like we can never trust our child again. But here’s the truth: lying is normal. It's wrong and goes against our values, but telling a lie to get out of a challenging situation or to get something doesn’t necessarily mean that your child is headed for deep trouble. Lying is actually a faulty problem–solving skill. It’s our job as parents to teach our children how to solve those problems in more constructive ways. We can also teach our children the natural consequences that occur when they choose to lie. Lying is a challenging issue to address, but there are effective things you can do as a parent to address it.
“My 17 year old son lies all the time,” a mother said to me recently. “He lies about his schoolwork, what he ate for lunch and whether or not he’s brushed his teeth. He also exaggerates to make his stories more dramatic or to make himself sound bigger. It’s come to the point where I... Read more »
Q: When your child lies to you, it hurts. As parents, it makes us angry and we take it personally. We feel like we can never trust our child again. Why does lying cause such anger, pain and worry for parents? James: Parents are understandably very afraid of their children getting hurt and getting into trouble,... Read more »
Sneaky behavior such as lying and stealing are some of the hardest issues for parents to deal with. When your child lies and sneaks around, it can feel like a betrayal and begins to feel like a moral issue. You start to question their character. You may start to dislike your child. Let’s face it—many of us were... Read more »
When you catch your child in a lie, it's natural to feel betrayed, hurt, angry, and frustrated. But here's the truth: lying is a normal child behavior problem. It needs to be addressed, but for most kids, it's not a character flaw, and it's not an issue of morality. Instead, lying is the immature and ineffective... Read more »
When your child lies to you, it stirs up a potent mix of emotions. You might feel angry, hurt, and offended all at once. Lying is extremely upsetting for parents because it shakes the foundation of trust we have in our child. So it's understandable and normal if you have an emotional reaction to lying—whether... Read more »
