Most parents would love to see their kids manage their intense emotions without falling apart or taking their frustrations out on others. It's hard to watch your children react to their upset feelings by flying off the handle, holding a grudge, complaining or insulting the people around them when their emotions are running high. As... Read more »
I realized recently that if I'm going to protect my daughter, sometimes the answer has to be "no." This isn't the fun part of being a parent. My daughter looks so mature. She tells me she can handle it; I can trust her. She has it under control. She’s so convincing. It sometimes feels like I'm talking to someone... Read more »
Making excuses may start innocently enough—kids don't like consequences, and they make excuses to get out of them. It's annoying, but we tolerate it. But over time, children may use excuses as a way to avoid responsibility. And the more a child avoids responsibility, the more excuses are needed to get by in the world. And... Read more »
Picture this scene: Your teen’s curfew is 11:30 p.m. and you stay up waiting for her. When she doesn’t come home on time, you pace and worry, your mood alternating between fear and anger. When your daughter finally waltzes in well past midnight, she disrupts everyone in the house and makes excuses when you ask,... Read more »
Harsh punishments are not effective for improving a child's behavior. Instead, they only create resentment. If you punish your child too harshly, he will only be thinking about his anger toward you and not about the consequences of his actions. Harsh punishments will only lead him to think that you are unreasonable and unfair. Unfortunately, this... Read more »
How many times has this happened to you? You set a limit on behavior, and your kids ask, “Why?” or ignore your limits entirely. Or perhaps it’s a war of inches—your adolescent tests you by coming in a few minutes later past curfew each time he goes out. Then he accuses you of being petty... Read more »
I've worked with many parents who are frustrated because their child won't accept 'no' for an answer. Too often, these parents feel it's important to explain their reasoning in an attempt to get their child to understand. Unfortunately, wanting your child to understand can easily shift into wanting their approval or acceptance of your reasons.... Read more »
Does your child often perceive himself as being right when he's wrong and wrong when he's right? Does he wonder why everyone is always mad at him? Some children have a hard time reading social cues and it has a profound impact on their behavior. Misreading social cues can include not understanding other people's words,... Read more »
You often hear kids say, "I'm sorry, but..." and follow their apology with an excuse. "I'm sorry, BUT you wouldn't let me play my video games." "I'm sorry I kicked a hole in the wall, BUT you told me I couldn't go outside." What your child really means is this: "I'm sorry, BUT it was your fault." Or another... Read more »
“Because I said so!” What parent hasn’t said these words to their child in a moment of sheer exasperation? What you’re really saying is that you are the one in charge and you want the discussion to end. Of course, sometimes ending it abruptly is appropriate and sometimes it’s not. When this phrase is used... Read more »
